What Do You Think About Women?

What do you think of 115 thinkgs about women:





1. Maternity Leave- 6 months paid vacation and all you do is have a baby.


2. We got off the Titanic first


3. We are better dancers


4. Taxis stop for us first


5. We can pretend to be pregnant and get lots of attention on buses


6. We don't go bald after our 26th birthdays


7. We can cry and get out of stressful situations. Like a speeding ticket. Heck, crying gets you out of anything.


8. We can flirt our way out of a speeding ticket. Heck, you can flirt your way out of anything.


9. We live longer than men


10. We smell better


11. Phone conversations are better than a soap opera


12. Ladies Night.


13. We don't have to open our own jars.


14. We don't have to kill our own food.


15. We get put up on a pedistal


16. We rarely have to carry our own suitcases.


17. We know stuff about everyone.


18. Short skirts will always cure unemployment


19. You're 5 times less likely to kill yourself


20. You never get a draft card.


21. It's easier to get a credit card.


22. You rule the bathroom


23. It's ok for you to marry for money.


24. Long nails make great weapons.


25. Divorces are profitable in your favor.


26. If the police is looking for you, it's easier to disguise yourself.


27. Sex is just another chocolate.


28. No matter how long it takes you to get ready, guys will ALWAYS wait for you.


29. Free flowers.


30. Free dinners.


31. Free lunches.


32. Free brunches


33. Revenge is our specialty


34. You'll get asked to have sex for about 90% of your life.


35. Men are optional.


36. You can whip men for money.


37. You'll probably never have to change a lightbulb.


38. Nobody will ever slap you for telling a dirty joke.


39. You can sue for sexual harassments.


40. You know that penis size really does matter.


41. PMS means you're right. About anything. Got a f***ing


problem with that?


42. Short girls are "petite". Short guys are "midgets".


43. Grooms all look the same. Everyone only wants to see the Bride


44. Girls can go together to a public restroom without looking like a fag


45. It's ok if girls hang out with gay guys. If straight men hang out with lesbos, it's considered an affair.


46. Friends won't call you "pussywhipped" behind your back


47. With 1 bottle of frozen sperm, we could populate the earth for


400 years with no need for men, "in theory".


48. You can "fake" anything


49. No matter how ugly you are, you'll always be able to get laid.


50. Your skin is softer.


51. You secretly admire Loreena Bobbitt


52. Valentine's Day was invented just for you


53. Someday you'll be a rich widow.


54. Being bisexual is considered a "bonus"


55. No matter how much time a guy spends on himself, you'll still


look better.


56. You won't get someone pregnant


57. You get hit on first most of the time


58. You don't have to buy wedding rings


59. You never have to change your oil.


60. You don't have to pump your own gas


61. You never have to change a flat tire in the rain.


62. If you feel like trapping your husband, there's always the "do I look fat?" test


63. Your adult children will come home often because of your fabulous home cooked meals.


64. You can't get thrown in jail cause of child support.


65. It empowers you when someone notices your new hair cut.


66. You can do your own laundry without your laundry turning pink.


67. Shopping somehow makes your life feel complete.


68. You can resolve arguments without giving someone a black eye.


69. The real beauty of e-mail is obvious to us - a further dimension to our social lives


70. You can scam maternity leave by looking fat.


71. You don't have to mow the lawn


72. Longer orgasms


73. You don't have to worry about getting punched when you cut someone off in traffic


74. If you gave your boyfriend/husband a black eye, they will think it's his fault not yours.


75. We don't grow nose hairs.


76. We have total control over our eyebrows.


77. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.


78. People envy you if you're a "daddy's girl". It's sad to be a "mama's boy"


79. We control the population.


80. Free drinks


81. You have a secret power to somehow hold your fart in public.


82. We get to choose the movie


83. We get all expensive paid trips-all we have to do is sleep with the guy.


84. We never have to pay when we go on dates.


85. We get to sleep on the bed when we have an argument with our man. Men get to sleep on the couch.


86. PMS is a legal defense for murder.


87. We're better manipulators.


88. We can masturbate more in a day than men.


89. We never run out of excuses.


90. We get EXPENSIVE jewelry as gifts that we NEVER have to give back.


91. We get candy, flowers and jewelery all the time cuz men **** up so often


92. We get massages


93. We're better parents.


94. We are cleaner


95. We have a higher tolerance of pain


96. We often get to cut in line


97. We are more flexible


98. No penis envy


99. Better tips


100. Men hold the door open for us.


101. We pout better (those puppy dog eyes always work!)


102. We lie better


103. We can marry rich and then not have to work


104. Women can go a day without showering or shaving and not look or smell disgusting - thank god for long pants and perfume!


105. Women who dont wear underwear are considered sexy and wild, when men do it, its rather disgusting


106. We can throw a punch at a man and not get hit in return


107. We dont have excessive amounts of body hair


108. We dont have to drive when on a date


109. Men fantasize about sex 20 times a day but women can get laid more often.


110. We are sexier


111. We express ourselves better


112. An oblong vegetable is all we need for a good time any night


113. Women do less time for violent crime


114. Women's conversations generally consist of more than just "uh huh, yep, ok, then bye"


115. We can talk to our mom everyday and it's considered normal.

What Do You Think About Women?
Wow, that was good


And soooo true
Reply:well that just acts like we take advantage of everyone and everything. The first one about all we do is have a baby. Ok for other moms I don't think that one is just a walk in the park it is really hard when you are a new mom at first and giving birth hurts Report It

Reply:Can't think that much. TOO LONG!
Reply:hmmmmm
Reply:Some might have too much time on their hands.
Reply:Sounds like they take advantage of everybody! Karma, baby.
Reply:thats great!!
Reply:you forgot one thing


we get stuck with dead beat dads who don't pay child support and we are the ones ending up being the barrer of bad news
Reply:I made it to #67. Good points but now my brain hurts.
Reply:The list is too long, I'd say I need to find the right one for myself.
Reply:fo sho! sorry about guys luck lol
Reply:I think you have covered it all.
Reply:I think that about sums it up... Although, I do pump my own gas and I have changed a flat tire in the rain. I also own more power tools than most men (and I know how to use them)... That's what's so great about women - we know how and can do most anything. We just choose not to either because A) we don't want to get our hands dirty, or B) we know when a man needs his ego boosted and we can pretend to be helpless to make him feel big and strong.
Reply:I gave up after #23 but #10 seems a bit "Fishy" LOL.

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